- Anthony Bourdain
Anyone who knows me will tell you that I love to eat. And while it’s true I love a good meal as much, if not a bit more, than the next person — it’s not just about the food. There is something about sharing a meal and conversation, about the act of breaking bread with others that is often even more satisfying than the food itself. Maybe that’s why I remember Anthony Bourdain’s shows so fondly. The food featured in his programs always looked inviting, if a little strange, but more importantly the conversations with people he encountered were genuine and honest. He led with a sense of curiosity and a disarming openness that resulted in real connection despite barriers of language, taste, tradition, or geography. Every time I watched Bourdain I was struck by his knack at bringing different people together and finding common ground. There is a word in Spanish, “sobremesa,” which doesn’t have a direct English translation. It literally means “over the table,” but the more meaningful translation but is explained as follows:
It's that time spent after a meal, hanging out with family or friends, chatting and enjoying each other's company...
Another definition: "Time spent in conversation, digesting, relaxing, enjoying. Certainly not rushing. Not reserved for weekends — though it can be longest on Sundays — even weekday and business meals have sobremesa. For Spaniards, how we eat is as important as what we eat."
For all of us, how we talk and interact with each other is just as important as what we discuss. Now more than ever I’ve found it is important to take time to connect with families, friends, and colleagues. There is so much common ground to discover, and when differences arise, we should avoid hostility and divisiveness. Two close friends of mine at my law firm happen to be people whose politics are diametrically opposed to my own. We have interesting and sometimes intense, thought-provoking discussions. We often disagree, but we listen. And we all share a love of family, as well as considerable affection for a good burger or a slice of New York pizza. As Bourdain said, respect and agreement need not go hand in hand. Right now, the pandemic may be forcing us to stay at home, but we can still reach out beyond our own perspectives. While traveling to new places is unfortunately currently off the menu, we do have the opportunity with Primerus to journey outside our boundaries and develop connections with people who are very different than ourselves. Just like a potluck supper, we are all coming to the table offering up something uniquely our own, and we all benefit by sharing together. We are working to build a global community at a time when countries and even individual states and neighborhoods are shutting their borders. These virtual coffees and Zoom meetings are certainly not the same as actually getting together, but they will have to do for now. I look forward to the time when I can see you all again in person.