Skip to main content

View more from News & Articles or Primerus Weekly

A few years ago, my son asked me how he could be “tougher.”  At first, I told him he was tough enough already and sort of dismissed the question as another random thought from an 8-year-old.  He persisted though.  I asked him, “Tougher in what way?”   He said he just wanted to be tougher.  I didn’t really know why he was asking and exactly what he meant, but the answer I gave him that day was “Son, if you want to be tough, you have to do tough things.” That was the first time I had ever uttered that phrase, but since that time my son and daughter have probably heard it 100 times.

You don’t wake up one day being tough.  You don’t go to bed one way and wake up different.  The person you are when you fall asleep will be the same one that arises the next day.  For growth, you have to take on challenges, you have to work hard, you have to push past your limits.  Each time you do something tough, you place a brick in your wall of toughness.  The challenges can be physical, mental, emotional, social, etc.  It does not matter.  When that wall is built brick by brick, it becomes hard for any one person or any one thing to tear it down.  However, each time you quit, each time you don’t try, each time you take an easier way out, you pull a brick out of that wall.  At the end of each day you will have either fortified your wall by your decisions or you will have weakened it.

Overall character works the same way. One is not given character; one builds it through each decision they make.  In the same way you do tough things to become tough, you must make principled choices to become a person of great character.  Tough times can help accelerate the building of your character.  Helen Keller once said, “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.” Without question everyone is experiencing trials these days and many, unfortunately, are suffering.  Our everyday lives, our routines, and our schedules have all been turned upside down.  It is in times like this though that we can achieve real personal growth.  I hope that in the days and weeks ahead, you will use these uniquely challenging times as an opportunity to fortify your wall of toughness and build your character!